Lions.

While High:

http://pastebin.com/97rJAw6j

That is all.

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Crap.

While High:

When the weed is crap. – A poem by While High

What a sad day is

when the weed you buy is crap.

Your day turns to shit.

You were just sold

some sad schwag man

it happens to the best of us

it happens all the time.

It is so sad and turbulent

the fact that I got sold some bad weed

But who cares, right?

As long as tomorrow I can go and buy more.

Also, what the fuck?

Rape is Formidable Profession.

While High:

I think being a rapist would be a good, fun job.

Here is why:

5. The hours. You can work at any time during the day or night, Want to go to the movies? Rape a bitch inside the theater. Make work Fun.

4. The pay. You know that for everyone adult that you rape (or any of those stinky Jersey Shore kids) you will at least get $100 in cash and or valuable stuff. That’s $100 for less than 5 minutes of work (if you come fast).

3. The respect. People who know you rape won’t fuck with you. They know you will fuck them (in the ass).

2. The Fame. In all truth, the only two ways to be famous is to either sing or rape. Sometimes, even both, according to R. Kelly.

1. The fact that you  get to fuck any woman you want without having to even ask for her name. That’s some pimp ass shit right there.

No more lists. I’m starting to feel like Fark.com. The place of lists.

PS.  If you are a feminist. Fuck you.

Bye!

Jokes of the racist kind.

While High:

In my never ending quest to be funny. I’ve decided to tell some racist jokes. But, for the sake of good taste, I decided to post them in my own sublime style. Here they are:

Jew|Oven

Black|Chicken

White|Meth

Chinese|Dog Eater

See. I told you so. Good taste.

I love her, but I can’t say anything.

Love is hard on the heart, it enslaves the mind.

It conjures of magical emotions from which we fear

because we will be hurt by those we consider dear.

Let there be no love, there be no life.

It is the physical sensation of being in love

that makes a man kill another man.

Love is a Mother Fucker.

Friday, the movie, is a great movie to watch while high. Specially since Nia Long is in it. God dammit. I love black women.

BLACK WOMEN OF AMERICA WHO ARE NOT FAT OR GROSS. CALL ME.

Good bye!

Alive.

While High:

My Top Ten List of People who should die from a brain aneurysm:

10. Peter North. While ejaculating the classic 5 roper. It would make a dramatic end to a fantastic performance. I’m not gay. I think.

9. Barack Obama. Nah, The President is cool. I only wish him good. He should die of age. Long life for The President.

8.That last one sucked.

7. Mickey Mouse. I hate that fucking mouse.

6. The girl that dissed me in 12th grade. I don’t even remember her name, but fuck that bitch anyway. *Give me a call if you remember that, and want to hook up*

5. I want to hook up with some nice lady to hang out and smoke out. Call me.

4. Milk, bread, cheesecake, those little cookies in the blue wrapper, and toilet paper. Damn, that’s $60 right there. Fuck.

3. George Lopez – He is not funny. In either language.

2. So, I received the Tax Refund on my wife’s bank account and she spent it and did not “notice”. Yeah right. Now I’m (surprise) broke.

1. Arsenio Hall. Those big ass eyes make him funny. He also look like a horse. A funny horse. Holy shit while I’m typing this I’m using Peter Griffin’s voice and makes this whole thing sound pretty funny. The guy who does Family Guy has pretty teeth. I’m not gay. Just married.

0. (This is a base zero count)Blanka from Street Fighter 2. Ugly fuck.

So, there you go. The Official While High list of people that should ride bikes to work and get paid with Euros.

****

A Honorable Mention to the Reddit Community. They are Great.

****(ass kissing mode off)***

*Retarded Policeman* B-Y-E-!

Face.

While High:

My face looks as if its gonna rain. Tell Bertha to go and get her coat so we can live to Louisville. My aunt Jemaima has a plantation there and we might need to take the boarding pass and have it at hand while the TSA searches your personality is so nice and sweet. Yes.

I’m glad you said that about me. Yes. Because it makes me feel appreciated by someone I secretly love Godzilla. I know. It sounds weird coming from King Kong, but hey, I’m about trying new things, and what is newer than Godzilla. Hell, even Hillary Clinton danced. It was a fun party. Lots and lots of nerd, though.

Anyways, thanks to all of those of you who have taken the time to ride my bicycle. It is such a beautiful day to ride my bicycle. Bye.

Review Time Attack TOP GEAR 1320 PROJECT.

While High:

Movie review of the movies I’ve watched:

Kick Ass – The action was very good. Made me cry (I’m so high). Did not feel long. Good movie to watch high. Got boner from girl. Feel weird.

Machete – Great movie to watch high. Still dont know why the long haired lady with the machete is so angry about.

Inglorious Basterds – Not a good movie to watch while high. Too much dialog is hard to follow. Also, brad pitt looks like a pornstar in it. Yeah, and they killed hitler in a theater? What the fuck? No, no, no. Everyone knows it was in a submarine.

Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo – I would have done the same thing with the bong and the plane. Also, Cockmeat sandwich. Yuck.

Hancock – Sucked. The lady is another super hero? What the fuck is going on? Now she is Storm? Dude, get me outta this place.

PS. When I watch Entourage while high I fantasize about being jimmy pivens character, Ari Gold.

FUCK YOU WHORE. YEAH, YOU HEARD ME YOU FUCKING WHORE. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY OFFICE. WILL SOMEBODY PLEASE ESCORT THE WHORE TO THE ELEVATOR. THANK YOU.